Opinion: Don’t put your foot in it when buying new wellies

Back in November 2019, I would have scoffed at anyone suggesting “next autumn will be even wetter”. Surely that wasn’t possible. Yet, after 30 days and 280mm of rain, October 2020 was indeed the wettest ever recorded at our local weather station.

Around the farm, areas known to puddle have become ponds. A flock of mallards has made its home on a lake in a field of wheat, as if to emphasise the point.

See also: Farm welly boots on test – which is the best buy?

The torrential rain has also exposed failures in vital farm kit. My wife, Gilly, and I debated: should we repair, replace like-for-like, or trawl Farmers Weekly to see if newer models offer improved performance? We eventually agreed, replacements are required. 

I dislike farm machinery. It is nothing more than a necessary evil. It’s expensive to buy and maintain, and spends too much of its life sitting idle. But I adore the wellington boot – a versatile, sleek and essential piece of a farm’s fabric. Purchasing additions to our “feet fleet” needed careful consideration.

At first glance, the choice is straightforward. Requirement: comfortable and dry. But it isn’t that simple. With no shop assistant to press down on your big toe, assure you they are the perfect fit and point you to the counter, lockdown boot buying is complicated. Much like the evolution of the seed drill, our needs have become more sophisticated as the environment around us has changed. 

I recall as a boy tripping over clunky wellingtons that littered our scullery. Big black boots with a distinguishing yellow stamp on the shin were my father’s welly of choice. One pair of Bullseyes for feeding the pigs and another, less smelly pair for walking around the farm.

In those days, the welly was a two-piece; the boot and an oversock. He had all manner of Husky oversocks – a kind of gilet for the foot, worn in a vain effort to make the Bullseye warm and comfortable.  

Today’s farmer is less tolerant. We want warmth, grip, safety and comfort – not necessarily in that order, nor at the same time. The boot that is appropriate for standing in a parlour may not be the same boot you choose to walk miles and miles in.

Gilly’s primary concern is warmth, then comfort. Let’s be honest, you wouldn’t buy a Muckboot for its looks. Meanwhile, I was trying to find a successor to the best gumboots I have ever owned.

Better than the Dunlop Purofort, Le Chameau or even the Hoggs special, the Hunter Balmorals were bought for me as a gift. Unassuming, warm but not sweaty, with more vintage charm than urban chic. But, as is normally my way, I like change. So when seeking a replacement, like-for-like seemed dull. 

The past fortnight has seen a string of boot deliveries come and go. Le Chameau felt a little bit too “Royal Agricultural University” for long hikes and field walking, whereas the Dunlop appeared lonely if it strayed too far from a slurry of mud or a pressure washer.

The Aigle was too French – great for Le Parisien Basin, but not Hertfordshire’s medium clay with flints. And the regular Hunter? Well, just too Harpenden.

So, after much deliberation, Mrs P is having her faulty Muckboot replaced (free of charge), and the Balmorals will be given a puncture repair makeover, so they can see out another October.